Facebook Notification: April 13th 5PM, join us at the Lucky Beaver in Reno for Guerrilla Queer Bar, where we crash a straight bar for the night to make a safe place for those in our community to breed tolerance and acceptance.
After 6 years of devotion to nurturing her babies and going to college in pursuit of a Master’s degree Ayden was getting out more for what she called "adult time".
Years ago, after a few long and failed relationships, Ayden took control of her life by ensuring she got what she wanted most out of it, children and a family. Ayden had a little girl and a little boy through the same involved sperm donor. When they came along she gave herself to them and even finally pursued a higher education beyond an associate’s degree to provide and set an example for her little ones. Ayden's passion in life concerned intellectualism and living life to the fullest through a variety of defiant outlets. She was perpetually looking for the next adventure ever since she started adulthood by joining the military and traveling the world.
This woman who had sacrificed so much, given up so much for her family finally wanted something more for herself too. Ayden was thinking she was finally ready to try and meet people, and maybe date again. The bid to crash a straight bar, named the Lucky Beaver no less, seemed like a prime opportunity to put herself out there again at a funky meet and greet event. Ayden didn't have the courage to attend such an event stag, so she enlisted her friend Jenna to tag along for the ride. As always Ayden arrived early, as her friend was running late. Those who are always on time seem karmically doomed to associate with those who are chronically late. Ayden had long since made herself acclimate to such occurrences and people in life.
In a brief moment of dauntlessness Ayden went inside alone. She crept up to the bar with swagger and a faked sense of confidence and pride, and ordered a pear cider. As she sipped the crisp tangy cocktail she was at once greeted from behind by an acquaintance and the host of the event, Mariah, a prominent lesbian in the local community. Mariah asked "I figured your here with us, as wearing cargo pants and a wallet chain just screams of a handsome dyke!" Ayden smirked and laughingly assured Mariah she was with the queers. After a quick chit chat and run down about "getting back out in the community", another woman walked into the straight bar and was kindly approached by Mariah. Ayden was momentarily dumbfounded by the dark skinned beauty with a soul melting smile. Mariah, seeing Ayden's eyes quickly introduced the two. This new Woman in Ayden's world, Ava, was 7 years younger with gorgeous curly hair, enchanting big eyes, and the voice of a sweet insolent angel. Even from a table away Ayden could smell the heaven wafting off Ava. At once the two started the get to know each other with flirty smiles, dangerous tones of voice, and tempting body language. They found they had a connection as the two both working in the medical field, albeit in very different professions. The conversation drew on even as distractions attempted to inhibit them. It was as if they were the only two in the room, and all else fell away. As they spoke and laughed Ayden grew in serious like of Ava and her sassy charm. Ayden was nervous yet calm at the same time. Ayden wasn't sure if Ava liked her as well, as she had always been oblivious to flirting and subtle hints of like when she liked someone. As the night was coming to end, the conversation drifted to Ayden's former profession as a successful bouncer and investigator. As Ava and Ayden were walking to their cars, that were coincidently parked next to each other, Ayden was discussing how she could "take" any man no matter how large in a fight due to her professional experience. To which Ava replied "but I bet I could take you". Unsure of Ava's intention when she made this statement Ayden quickly quipped "In a fight no, but perhaps in other ways!" Ava smiled and blushed incessantly. They bade each other good night and left.
On the drive home Ayden thought about Ava. Was she too young? Ayden usually dated woman 5-15 years her senior, so this was new territory. Ava was so mature and had her shit together. But was she really emotionally mature? Ayden tried not to think about it further. Still she added Ava as a friend to her Facebook and checked out her profile once she was accepted. This deliriously amazing woman was beyond interesting. Ava had a child as well. Hence the main issue that had stood in the way of so many relationships for Ayden, being a lesbian mother, was not an issue with Ava. "What to do about her?" Ayden thought on and off all night. Something about her smile, eyes, and voice captured Ayden, as all of these kept flashing through her mind.... Only she never messaged. Fearing Ava wasn't into her.
When Ava did not get messaged right away from Ayden she thought an ex of hers who was in attendance at the bar, who was also a light acquaintance of Ayden',s had spoken ill of her because of their previous brief relationship. Ava had been in a fair amount of tumultuous relationships. With many of whom treated her poorly, lied, and sometimes even cheated. Owning so many trust issues from these relationSHITS, she had previously seen a counselor to make sure she was processing everything right, and coping in a way that would not preclude love and healthy relationship in the future. After some self-investment and work Ava had come out of these sessions ready for a new chapter in her life, so she thought. She hadn't much hope or expectation that she would find someone with all the traits she was looking for. Some traits particularly hard to find as Ava had a beautiful 8 year old daughter in the center of her life. Though Ayden was cute, deliriously charming, family focused herself, wickedly smart, and had her life in order Ava question whether she was worthy or lucky enough to have someone like that like or even fall in love with her. And so didn't message Ayden that night either.
© 2016 Audrey Colleen Burns
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